Gooooooooooaaaaaaaaal!

Usually, feline fam, the last thing you'll find us talking about here on I Can Has Cheezburger is sports. But that's because sports and cats almost never go together. Notice how we said "almost never", because there are some rare occasions when the two worlds coincide. Like, the Olympics, fur example. Every year that there are the Olympics, we always find some of the best original cat memes we've seen in a long time, so we actually have to pay attention to them. 

There may not be the Olympics this year, but if you haven't heard about it yet, the FIFA World Cup is happening in the United States. Everyone is all of a sudden obsessed with soccer (or football, for all those Europeans), but we still couldn't be bothered. That is, until we found this hissterical post from Cats With Jobs' X account. Now, all of a sudden, we're interested in soccer because one stray cat decided to crash the game and hang out in a goalie's net. If they were trying out for the role, they probably wouldn't get a contract because all they wanted to do was play with the water bottles and chill on the turf.

Only after the opposing team scored a goal did the kitty pounce into action, which is typical for cat behavior - only move when it's absolutely necessary. The goalie eventually shooed them off the turf, but any cat owner knows that you can't stop a cat from doing what they want to, and by golly, they really wanted to hang out under that netting. 

Did the cat help them win? Absolutely not. But did the match gain a few extra viewers simply because of the adorable feline? Yes, and it was worth it.

Are you guys normal, or do you also have a wicked sense of humor? 

Telling a well-timed joke is an art not many people learn to master until well into adulthood. Those of us with a peculiar sense of humor understand pretty fast that there are jokes that should never be said out loud, at least not in wholesome company. Sarcasm is relegated to the intimate social circles, and those gloomy jokes are for our besties' ears only. Sometimes we don't even tell them to our families. Especially if it's about a delicate subject. 

Reddit user u/KDragonDeluxe told an ill-timed joke in front of her parents. She says she's always been a sarcastic person and tends to tell jokes about things she's sure will never happen. Oh, poor innocent girl. Anyway, she went to her parents' house with her boyfriend and brother once and the environment was already kind of tense for some reason. So she joked about it to her parents, saying, "What, are you guys getting a divorce?" And, low and behold, they were… Talk about bad timing!

I don't think that hearing your parents are getting a divorce gets any easier when you're an adult. My parents are luckily still together and very much in love, and I'm pretty grown up, but my whole world would definitely come down if they suddenly decided to split up. For them, it must have been like that. Even harder, since they found out about it through a bad joke. 

I only hope those siblings and their parents are emotionally okay. Hopefully she  learned from that experience. If it were me, no more sarcastic jokes unless I know for a fact that what I'm about to say is 100% not happening. 

There's always the possibility that everybody got over it quickly, the divorce was amiable, and now all of that is a funny memory. That's the version I'm choosing to believe in, and I'm quite sure it is what happened. Otherwise, the Redditor would never have told the story, right? 

Do you have a neighbor who runs their business out of their home? If not, consider yourself lucky…

It doesn't matter what kind of business they run, it will always be a disturbance to those around them. They are either extremely loud, super noisy, or allow their customers to do whatever they want around the neighborhood. Usually, it is a combination of all three.

When someone invites their customers or clients into their business, which happens to be their home, they are bound to disturb the other residents as well, which is exactly what happens in the story below. The business owner didn't care that the many people coming to her house were a bother to others, and she didn't intend to bring the disturbance to a stop. At least that was until her next-door neighbor had had enough of her inconsiderate behavior.

As a yoga instructor, this woman has many clients coming to her house. Every lesson she gives involves at least a few people, and she probably gives some lessons every single day. That means that dozens of people come to her house on a daily basis. That also means that many cars find their way to the neighborhood, and every person who drives up expects to find a parking spot available.

That is where the next-door neighbor comes into the story. Despite the road being wide enough and the neighborhood pretty empty, the yoga instructor's clients kept parking their cars on the neighbor's front lawn. They didn't even try to avoid it; they viecles would be parked entirely on the front lawn when the neighbor arrived home.

Having had enough of the damage caused by complete strangers, the neighbor decided to confront the drivers and the yoga instructor and demand the stop. They even resorted to turning on their sprinklers on the parked cars to make a point. Did it help? You'll have to keep reading to find out…

If you want to stay over at someone's home, there's a basic rule: don't disrespect the person who lives there. That shouldn't be controversial. In fact, that is the bare minimum you expect.

The boyfriend's boundary makes so much sense. He has been living with his girlfriend for almost three years in an apartment they both pay for, which means the place is his home too. And his home is not a place his girlfriend can offer to any family member without his consent, regardless of how they treat him. 

The problem isn't that the girlfriend's sister needs help. The problem is that she has repeatedly disrespected her boyfriend in public, and now she expects to access his home anyway, as if nothing had happened. 

But what makes the situation even worse is that the girlfriend defends her sister instead of her boyfriend. She justifies her sister, saying she's "just like that" and that "she teases him because he's family". Making negative comments about his physical appearance and even saying he "at least makes money" is not harmless teasing. It is humiliating. And it is uncomfortable. 

So the boyfriend set a reasonable boundary when refusing to have his girlfriend's sister stay at his home. No one wants to be around someone who disrespects them and humiliates them. Just imagine spending an entire day and night together. 

If the sister wants to stay with them, the least she can do is apologize first. And then she should promise to stop making those kinds of comments. Even then, he wouldn't be obligated to say yes. 

Another week, another collection of the most viral and purrfect cat Twitter hits!

Here comes Monday again, along with all the things that it brings. A new week, a fresh start, an opportunity to take life by the reins and do things that we have always wanted to do and never done. Monday brings that, or… more realistically, Monday brings on another week of chaos that we do not feel equipped to handle. Not really. When we wake up on Monday morning, the first thing we do is look at our cats and mourn. Once again, instead of staying home and cuddling with our cats, we're leaving them alone. And maybe they are happy about the opportunity to cause chaos without interruption, but we are not. But we have to do it. We have to go out and make money so that our cats stay spoiled like they are, and that means that for our mental health, we have to turn to the next best thing. 

Every single week, first thing on Monday, we bring you a brand new collection of the best cat Tweets that Twitter has to offer. The cutest, the silliest, the spiciest, each more viral than the last. It will, of course, never replace the feeling of your fluffy cat in your arms, and yes, you will still think about your cats as you're sitting in the office, but it's the closest we can get. A dose of cat cuteness from the depths of the Twittersphere, without any of the chaos that usually surrounds it. Without the panic, without the drama. Only cats and nothing but cats. Now, you have something to do on your break other than doomscrolling on your phone. Five minutes of good cat content during a difficult Monday, and the day will feel at least a little less impawssible. 

Why would a boss think that an employee who was mistreated, overworked, and underpaid would leave a positive review about the job?

Bosses who have zero respect for employees are common. Bosses that overwork their employees are predictable. But bosses that expect a positive review after all that- that is shocking! The nerve that you have to pretend that an employee you forced to work over their job title for the same salary leaves a nice and extremely positive review after quitting because of the horrible work environment. It doesn't even make sense. Why would you pretend that? Why would a boss think they have the right to demand a positive review of a former employee who left because of them? In what world did he think that was possible?

In this Reddit story, we are presented once again with malicious compliance in its full splendor. Complaining about what your boss, or in this case, former boss, asked only to create a bigger problem. This boss not only has an incredible nerve, but he also believes he still has some kind of power over a former employee, and he even thinks he has to ask for a favor from an employee that he mistreated during their time in the company. If you have to beg for reviews for people to want to work with you when we are in a job crisis, that is because your company values are especially questionable and your work environment is unbearable. The fact that, as a manager, you know that you are doing something wrong, but instead of fixing it, you believe that the best solution is to beg former employees to leave a positive review, as well as writing a bunch of fake ones so people believe it is an amazing place to work.

If you are a manager looking for amazing reviews to make the job opening that your company has go away. Stop pretending that former employees will do anything for you. Instead, start making actual changes to the work environment. That will not only boost productivity as employees are in better conditions, but also it will get the word out that your company is a nice place to work. No more false reviews. Just make the changes and stick to them so that working there isn't the worst thing. 
 

In heatwaves like the ones we're having now, we are not the only ones who suffer. 

It has been an extra hot summer so far. Maybe it's bad luck, maybe the gates of the underworld have finally opened to punish us for our weird Twitter feed, maybe we're just noticing it more because more people are complaining. Either way, it's hot. And our cats are feeling it too. I see it even at home. My cat, who's one of those cats who love to sunbathe so much that she'll scream at me every morning, exactly five minutes after breakfast, to open the balcony for her so she can chill in her favorite sunspot - even she barely manages to spend five minutes outside before coming back in and chilling in the cool sink. Sleeping under blankets - another one of her favorite activities - is something she's not even considering if the AC isn't on. It has been too much heat for her very fluffy body. 

But it's not just house cats who are feeling the heat. Stray cats are feeling it even more. To an extent, they know what they are doing. They know all the shady spots around. Our building cats all gather near the entrance to the building, waiting for me or one of the other neighbors to open the door for them so they can chill inside… But what if you are a house cat who just so happened to escape during a heatwave? That's the question @benmyfriend1 on X answered this week. It's bad enough for a house cat to escape into a completely unknown territory, where they don't get spoiled with food, shelter and love every second of the day. When the heat hits, and there's no available water around… the only thing left to do, apparently, is give up and hope that someone kind will save you. 

Breakup logistics are basically the Hunger Games of adulthood, except instead of a bow and arrow you're armed with a calculator, and everyone still ends up drained and empty over rent.Dividing assets after breaking up with someone is basically a small war, except here, instead of arguing over who keeps the good couch, the woman formerly known as girlfriend is arguing over who keeps the lease that's about to financially waterboard them.

Amongst the chaos and calamity of day to day life there are hidden many things that have much more to them than the eye can see. One of those things are our cat childs'  eyes. Two round orbs full of features and fine details that make even the most imaginative painting look banal by comparison. So we invite you to stop what you are doing and indulge in a hypnotic moment to quiet your mind.

Chaos surrounds us in this life, whether it be the constant onslaught of information from our phones, the madness of the modern office or even just the pace of life, we hoomans are always on the look out for something that can help us stop for a moment and appreciate the moment we are in. Many seekers of such quiet turn to yoga or meditation but we wanted to give our cat loving readers something feline themed so that you could enjoy both the awwplifting energy of the cats you love so much as well as a calming and cleansing quietening of your mind.

Which is how we came to this collection of especially mesmerizing cat eyes. Even as pawrents to feline kids we very rarely get to take in the out of this world features of our felines' eyes. Namely because they tend to prefer to look at things that are not us or they are asleep. So we wanted to give you the opportunity to see just how incredibly gorgeous our cat childs' eyes truly are and how soothing it can be to gaze into them and let the world melt away behind you.
 

The age old question of how to get a cat to stop doing something you do not want them to do is back again. This time we are taking a specific look at how pawrents have put in place protections against their crazy cat kids clambering up on their kitchen counters. So let's dive in and see how these hacks have held up.

Some might say that Reddit's r/CatTraining subreddit is an example of trying to plug a hole in a dam with your finger. The fix works while you are there giving it your all but the moment you step away all heck breaks loose. But nonetheless cat pawrents still try to do their best to train their cats, even if the effects are only felt when their pawrents are around. And thanks to their insights we were able to make this helpful list of tricks to keeping cats off your counter.

Now, there are more than a few ways that the pawrents in this list have approached the problem. For some it is a training issue, meaning they advocate for the use of consistent commands and cues so that the cat child learns to properly understand they are being told what to do and not randomly yelled at. For some it is a reactive situation, these pawrents have given up training and believe that the only solution is to react when the event pops up. While others have chosen more practical options such as doors and baking paper. We invite you to settle into a comfy chair and have a notepad ready to jot down some of your preferred plans of action to try on your counter surfing cat at home.
 

Weddings are getting weirder and weirder

It's interesting to me that a ceremony that's so ancient starts being updated by TikTok trends and millions of very strange new cultural practices. Where it gets very weird to me is when the most important thing in a celebration is the aesthetic part, not the part where you share an experience with the ones you love and they welcome the new era you are entering. This wedding guest survived a last-minute change announced via the wedding's website and caused drama by unknowingly wearing a banned color. Have we gone too far with the wedding-tok?

A "promotion" with no raise is just your job slapping a shinier name tag on the same paycheck and hoping you're too flattered to check the mathIt's like getting upgraded to "Premium Economy" but you're still stuck in the same seat, same legroom, same bag of stale pretzels, just now with better vocabulary to describe your misery.

How many ways can you prove that your cat is actually a cat?

Our feline friends just have the darnedest ways of getting themselves into sticky situations, and then leaving it up to us hoomans to get them out of it. And believe you me, I've seen a lot of absolutely absurd cat stories in my time writing for I Can Has Cheezburger, like when this wife found out her husband was role-playing as a cat for years online. This story, from Reddit's r/cats community (and X), might just take the cake for "most ridiculous cat story of all time". 

Felix Martinez got a summons to show up for court duty. The problem is, Felix Martinez is a cat. Somehow, there was a clerical error in the county's data and the summons got sent to Felix, and not his pawrent. The pawrent then spent 6 weeks trying to convince the court that Felix could not attend jury duty, all for very real reasons:

Felix has paws.
Felix does not understand human language.
Felix cannot comprehend legal proceedings.
Felix has no means of transportation, except for his hooman.

All of these reasons were rejected, including a medical note from Felix's vet proving his exemption. So, what was this pawrent left to do except show up on the court day with Felix in a carrier?

This goes a bit farther than your average "cat got stuck behind the wall" story, but it's hilarious all the same. It does, also, purrfectly point out just a few of the faults in our legal system, because if you can't prove your cat can't show up for jury duty because he's a cat, then how are you supposed to prove anything else?

Just another average day on the internet, if you ask me. What a purrfectly great day to be alive!

It's ameowzing how something so small can have such a huge effect on someone's life.

It's funny how life takes you on a roller coaster full of twists and turns, to your highest points, down to your lowest, and then back up again. It will throw you curveballs time and time again, and just when you think you've come back to an even keel, it will put another unexpected challenge right in front of you. But even after something as heartbreaking as a loss in the family, you can find hope. Sometimes it's in the form of a new, exciting job opportunity, or in our case, a smol pair of kittens.

Pratiti had just lost her cousin three days earlier when she found a tiny tricolored kitten outside the gate of her home. Seemingly abandoned, and knowing that she couldn't leave the kitten there, she took her inside and named her Toffee. She went back out and heard another weak meow coming from a nearby bush, and found Toffee's brother, 'Dark', and decided to take care of the two.

Just like life, though, this story doesn't go straight to a happy ending. 16 days after she found Toffee and Dark, Dark crossed the rainbow bridge. So soon after losing her cousin, grief overwhelmed her. But Toffee had a mission, and it was to help Pratiti recover through the beautiful bond they were forming.

Now, Toffee is a tiny, fearless explorer, a food-obsessed little menace, and one of Pratiti's favorite muses. After so much grief, Toffee became a daily source of laughter, hope, and joy. And, most impurrtantly, proof that sometimes the smallest life could leave the biggest light behind.

Why would someone think that the best thing to do after being kicked out of a hotel is to tell that story to the front desk employee at another hotel?

Guests are sometimes not only bad and disrespectful, but also extremely dumb. As if they weren't thinking before they talk. Or maybe they think that just because they are paying for a room, they have the right to say and do whatever they want. As if money bought everything, well, it doesn't. Having an attitude towards a front desk employee can 100% make you lose a reservation, and the fact that some guests don't know or think about this before they open their mouths baffles me. In this Reddit story, it is quite funny how clueless this guest had to be to act so carelessly, even though it would cost him the reservation. Maybe next time it's better to think before you talk.  

It's extremely shocking to me how some people manage. You go to a hotel to get a room and decide to pull a fire alarm to be disruptive? What is going on in your head to do that? Then the police come and kick you out, so you go to another hotel and immediately start talking trash about the previous hotel as if what they did was wrong. That not only caused you to not get a room in the new hotel, but it also shows how entitled you are. The fact that someone is so full of themselves that thinks not only that they can do whatever they want but also that no repercussions are really serious is incredible. 
If I were ever pulled out of a hotel by police workers, I'd be so ashamed of myself that I would immediately call a family member so they can pick me up and go home. But that wasn't the case with this guest. He had the luck not to get incarcerated for his scene, and he wastes it trying to act the same way in a new place and talking disrespectfully about the employees who had to put up with him. 
 

What concerns me the most is that if he hadn't started to tell his story to the other hotel worker, he may have gotten himself another room, and probably made a mess again. Because he proved that he didn't care and that he was entitled enough to believe that repercussions didn't mean anything. Acting like that in public is not excusable. No matter the state you are in, it's just blatantly disrespectful. 

If there's a cat on a glass table, you already know what has to happen next.

The second a cat jumps onto a glass table, every cat person has the exact same thought: "I need to see the loaf from underneath." It's impossible not to look. You don't even question it anymore. You just find yourself crouching down to admire the tiny toe beans and the fluffy little paws smooshed against the glass.

Every cat somehow looks different from below. Some turn into perfectly round marshmallows with feet. Others spread out just enough to show off a full collection of toe beans. Then there are the fluffy cats whose fur goes in every direction, making them look twice their actual size. No matter what, the underside view is always funnier than anyone expects.

The best part is when they notice you. You look up. They look down. For a few seconds, nobody really knows what's going on. The cat has that classic "Can I help you?" face while you're trying not to laugh at their squished little nose and fuzzy cheeks pressed against the glass.

It's also the only time you really appreciate how weird cats are. From above, they're a perfect loaf. From below, they're somehow all belly, fluff, and mystery. Where did the legs go? How are they comfortable like that? Nobody knows, and honestly, nobody needs an answer.

Glass tables weren't made for cats, but they've accidentally become one of the greatest gifts to cat people everywhere. Every loaf deserves to be admired from every angle, especially the one that comes with bonus toe beans. Once you've seen a cat loaf from below, checking underneath becomes part of the experience every single time.

When a relationship ends, the best course of action seems to be to let it be gone. But some may not think like that, unfortunately.

There is a problem that I'm starting to see in new relationships. There is this belief that love is always forever. Well, that's not exactly right, and thinking that it is can lead to toxic and problematic couples. Nothing is really forever, but especially love. There are millions of reasons to end a relationship, millions. Thinking that you are going to be forever together with your girlfriend is nice and sweet, and it's a good thing that you think that your future is together, but it becomes a problem if that blinds you from knowing that it can end. Of course, there is no point in being a couple if you think it's going to end, but it's not right to just believe that it can't end.

This whole debacle that the user wrote about in this Reddit story got me thinking about the problem that some people have to understand that something is over. The reaction he had when his girlfriend broke up with him was as if the main thing was to discover why it happened, when in reality you don't need a fully defined reason. It's over, and that's it. You can ask why, but it may not be just one thing, and it would probably make you incredibly sad. Also, the fact that most times when one of the people asks why is to see how they can fix it to get back together, and in reality, why would you want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with you?

Yes, your girlfriend dumped you, and? I get that it's sad, and it frustrates you the fact that there is nothing else to do about it. Sometimes the way this is expressed is not the best one, and it is complicated to stay in charge of your emotions when these things happen. But you are gonna get over it, and maybe even fall in love again. A breakup isn't the end of the world. And if as soon as your girlfriend tells you to break up you start thinking of all the things she did that you didn't like… then why do you want to get back together? Basically, what would you wanna be with someone that doesn't love you anymore? Don't make the situation harder and just let it be. Relationships end, life moves on, you get over it. 
 

When does helping a cat become "stealing" someone's pet?

Over on Reddit's r/cats subreddit, one cat lover shared a story that quickly became much bigger than a friendly feline asking for a few pets. At first, the cat seemed like any other outdoor kitty looking for attention. He'd stop by for a few scritches, then disappear again. As the weeks went by, though, little things became harder to ignore. He was constantly hungry, eating every meal like he hadn't seen food in days. His fur was dirty and matted, and a wound on his ear never seemed to get any better. Soon he was waiting outside the apartment every morning and sleeping on the patio every night. When heavy rain rolled in, leaving him outside soaked and shivering wasn't an option. He walked inside, curled up on the couch, and slept for hours.

Hoping there was a reasonable explanation, the rescuer tracked down the cat's owners. Instead, they insisted he was "fine" and said cats are independent. That answer didn't line up with what had been happening every day. A trip to the vet confirmed the cat was underweight, needed treatment for his ear, and hadn't been getting the care he deserved. The rescuer paid for everything without hesitation.

These days, the cat spends almost all of his time with the person who stepped in to help, only occasionally wandering back to his original home. Some neighbors joke that the cat was "stolen." Others quietly admit they rarely saw him being cared for in the first place.

One thing is clear: the cat made his choice long before the internet was asked to make theirs.

Revenge is delicious

I never thought baking delicious brownies could be implemented as a revenge tactic. Being 100% honest, I don't even think the people who ate them understood it as such, but I've now got to a way deeper realization: Maybe the only one who needs to feel the revenge worked is the one who did it. It would all be better that way; we would live in a world full of sweet, harmless revenges that satisfy the avenger only while nobody else notices. Let's read this Redditor's story and evaluate if he's the only one who understood it as revenge, or if it was so perfect and elegant that I can't fully comprehend it.

If a customer service person says they "cannot help you," it just means that you have to find someone else in their business who can.

There is no problem that a customer or a client of a business might have that the business cannot solve. They might not want to or think it's too much effort, so they tell you there's "nothing they can do". But there is always someone out there with the tools to help you, all you have to do is find a way to go over the heads of those who refuse to help and find the ones who will never turn their back on a customer.

But you have to be resilient for that to work. You have to be ready to put in the work and do the research to find the one person who can help you out. Because as soon as that one customer service worker tells you they can't help you, you are on your own. It's up to you to find the solution.

The bank customer who shared the story below on Reddit's r/pettyrevenge knew exactly how to get what they wanted, even when they were met with a refusal to help. The customer service lady who was supposed to help them solve their issue first said there was nothing she could do, and then stopped answering the phone altogether. The customer knew someone in the bank must have the answer to the problem, so they decided to get their attention no matter what.

So, they went on the bank's website, pulled up the email address of every person who has an important-sounding job title, and emailed them all an explanation of the situation, including the conversation with the unhelpful customer service lady.

It took a total of 10 minutes for them to get a reply saying that the issue was solved, from none other than the lady who claimed she could do nothing to help. Funny how that changed as soon as someone higher up found out about the issue…