Looking for a job doesn't mean that you deserve the position.

If you were actively looking for a particular job in your field and around your city and you didn't realize there was an opening that perfectly fit your expectations, then you aren't looking the correct way at all. If I had a friend who had become a colleague, as we studied the same and we dedicate our lives to the same thing, and they got a job that is close to where I live, so now they would move closer, I would be thrilled. Your friend and colleague, whom you like (that's why he is your friend), is moving closer to you and got the job he wanted. If you aren't happy for him, then you seem more like a hater than an actual friend.

Friends get happy for their friends' achievements. But not u/Throwaway130491. He got jealous over her friend getting a great job. And what makes everything worse is that he started to blame other things, not to admit that the problem he has with his friend staying at his place is actually the fact that he is jealous that he got a job he thinks he deserves just because he needs it. Being out of a job is hard, and you can be having a particularly hard time with it. But that doesn't mean that you can be out of your mind. A job is a job. A friendship is more than that. There will be other openings.

What gets me the most about this situation is the fact that this person is sure that if his friend had told him about the job, then he would have gotten it. That is an assumption, not a fact. When you are looking for a job, you are the one in charge of getting the interviews, not your friends. Especially when they are also looking for opportunities. So take the L and move on. The friend is going to live closer, and this person is only thinking of what would have been but never will be. 

This has to be one of the most annoying things somebody can ask you

You are lying there, feeling just fine; you are finally relaxed after a long week of stress and drama. Suddenly, out of the blue, your boyfriend comes and asks you the most low-key insulting question, without you signaling anything in particular, and maybe while you were even feeling pretty: 'Are you ok?' 'You seem tired or stressed.' 'You look sick'.

Are you kidding me? You're left there, unable to snap back because they weren't being outwardly violent, but also feeling bad because the remarks were low-key insulting about your appearance or demeanor.

One time is ok; I can understand it. My face might not be looking its best, but constantly? Come on.

Looking at it from the outside, the boyfriend obviously has a personal issue or anxiety that he's trying to project onto her. The thing is, when you are in a relationship that works like this, it's very easy to get confused and to start asking yourself whether you might be the problem

Let's be clear: not every issue is solved solely by breaking up; there are a million things you can try before, but breaking up should always be on the table.

Nobody should try to put up with everything; some things are simply off the table and are the other person's problems, and they should solve them by themselves.

How hard can it be to follow a recipe?

All it takes is some basic reading comprehension and the ability to follow basic instructions. It's not like you even have to read the overly long personal anecdote at the top of the recipe blog, or even do that much critical thinking. All that a simple, well-written recipe needs is for the cook to pay attention long enough to get the critical parts right.

Sure, everybody who has ever cooked something has made their mistakes when trying to whip up a meal. It is only natural to get distracted, skip a crucial ingredient or step, and be left wondering why you ever trusted yourself to make this particular food at all. 

However, perspective is everything when it comes to the ups and downs of learning to make a meal. If you ever want to get better, you have to be humble and own the mistake. It happens to everyone! While it can be frustrating, it isn't worth being angry about it for too long, and if it is a problem with the recipe, you can move on to a new one.

We might think that this is basic common sense, but you wouldn't always think that to read the comment sections of recipes online. There always seems to be one outlier who insists that they did nothing wrong and somehow, they made something disgustingly inedible. It might be something to do with the weird substitution they decided on, but who is to know? If only they made it obvious to us.

 

What would it take for you to storm out of someone's wedding?

Weddings can be pressure cookers. They're expensive, big events that take a lot of personalities and egos and put them into one room. If there is tension in the family already, weddings can exacerbate it. This is why we hear so many stories of families going at it on someone's big day. This story was no exception. Sometimes you just don't get along with your in-laws. For whatever reason, you got off on the wrong foot, and it feels impossible to recover from. You wish you could set aside your differences for the sake of family harmony, but that seems impossible. You don't want to have to put up with someone who doesn't have a lot of respect for you, and you shouldn't have to. But what happens during family events when you're all expected to be there? Do you just swallow your true feelings for the sake of keeping the peace or do you let it all out and face the consequences? 

In a situation like this, it's not just the two of you who are in an argument that it affects. It affects the whole family. When you're trying to come together to have a nice time, all it takes is one person to ruin it for everyone. At a wedding, it's undoubtedly the happy couple's day. Whatever they say goes, and if you're going to get in the way of that, you should probably leave. But what if your leaving the event has a lot more effect on the rest of the party? Is it better to stay and be miserable or leave and risk making a big scene? If you can't be mature about something, then it's better to leave it where it is. Having a blowout argument with the bride on her wedding day is not in great taste, so the woman in this story probably did the right thing by leaving. Her family didn't think so, though. Keep reading for all the details of the story and decide what you think about it.

I'm starting to believe some managers simply don't like us and will find any reason to make it our responsibility

It's really not that hard to believe; it's just like with teachers: it's not that you failed the exam because you didn't study and spent your afternoons playing Xbox; it's because they didn't like you! No, but seriously, how do you justify writing up somebody who arrives 5 minutes early every day?

This can change depending on the culture, but pretty much universally, being late is arriving AFTER the time you're supposed to start. This employee not only arrives on time, but she's also arriving early, so how can the manager keep a straight face while telling her what he told her? That's why I say he might be coming up with a random excuse just to push her to quit. Those things happen.

She posted this in the subreddit /AmIOverreacting. Do you think that's the case?

Is he being dramatic, or does he have a point?

It's not worth trying to force a familial dynamic that doesn't happen naturally. It doesn't work when parents try to make their new partner a surrogate parent without any consideration for the amount of time their kid has known their new partner. No child is going to treat somebody they've known for a couple of months or years the same way they treat their parents, whom they've known for their entire life. It's just totally unrealistic.

Adults wouldn't be able to treat random people they barely know as if they were their kids, so why would they expect it from their kids' stepparents? If your 16-year-old son brought his new friend Kyle to your house and told the whole family, "Kyle's my brother now. If you don't treat him like your son and brother, you inherently disrespect him and me." Meanwhile, you don't know this kid, don't particularly care about him, and don't accept him as part of your closest kin, yet there he remains. This situation doesn't happen with kids because they have less power within the familial unit. There is no shortage of parents who bring a new person into their family without consulting their children and immediately expecting them to treat this person as a family member. It's ludicrous! 

You wouldn't expect teenage stepsiblings to act like siblings, but you might expect it from half-siblings who share the same mother and live in the same household together. The older brother in this story barely sees his younger half-brother as family, and he's planning on cutting him off as an adult if he starts to resemble his stepfather too closely. 

Trusting the process doesn't mean burning your food… and your kitchen!

This time of the week has arrived, and that's time for my cooking fail collection. I'm always excited when Wednesday comes around because looking on the internet for the craziest cooking fails has become a beloved part of my day. Yes, I know these are failures, and we're not supposed to laugh about others' mistakes, but… come on! These pictures are too funny not to laugh about!

Also, when it comes to making mistakes, laughing about them is the best way to cure the embarrassment and the shame that it gives us. And that is especially important when talking about cooking fails. For some people, cooking seems easy and fun to do, but for others - like myself- it is a very complicated game and involves a bunch of practice and patience to get one decent meal out.

You can imagine how good I felt when I came across these cooking fails on the internet! It's like I've found my own tribe, and I didn't feel alone. Mastering a hobby is not an easy thing, so I send my biggest congratulations to all of those who know exactly how to cook, but for the rest of us who can do other things but not cook, these memes are for you!

Nobody wants to forced into accepting less than they deserve.

It's not a great idea to back anyone into a corner. If you have to trick or manipulate someone into doing something, it's probably not a great idea in the first place. That's what happened in this workplace story at a shrinking company. They were in a position where they had to cut benefits but wanted to keep their core employees. This is not a great way to inspire the people who work for you. It's hard to ask someone to give up something that they already had just for the sake of business. You have to be a little more tactful about these things or else you'll end up losing the talent on your team. The boss in this story didn't quite understand that, though, and wanted to make it the employee's fault when everything went sideways. 

In romance, nobody enjoys being the next best choice.

When it comes to finding a relationship, most people place a lot of emphasis on feeling special. No matter what their specific requirements for a partner may be, they need to feel like this is a person who genuinely wants to be with them and isn't interested in entertaining other options. Although this can sometimes seem like a tall order in the modern dating world, it is possible. A lot of the time, it is simply down to luck.

At the same time, not everybody is going to agree with somebody who chooses to enforce certain standards in their dating life. They believe that you need to be more open to get into a relationship. While it may be a lot easier to find somebody when you make certain compromises, it is also true that this relationship may not be as happy as one where you stick to your core principles. In some ways, the dating game is a constant trade-off between these two conflicting sides. However, most find that they would rather give that love to themselves than offer it to somebody who is not likely to appreciate it properly.

A hospital employee accepted a promotion with a written raise, only for HR to try to replace it with a pay cut after the work had begun

HR initially blamed a system error and promised back pay. Weeks later, another HR representative called from a personal phone and claimed the offer contained an administrative error. Then suggesting that they resign when they refused to sign a replacement offer, which was for lower than their original pay before they even took the new role.

This landlord had a simple theory of property ownership: the premium washer and gas dryer existed in the rental house, but they were not his appliances, not his responsibility, and definitely not his problem

Which means he's part of a divine group of landlords who have mastered the art of being a landlord only during the fun parts, meaning the monthly rent collection, the occasional inspection where they point at a plant and ask whether it belongs there, and the deep satisfaction of knowing somebody else is paying off their mortgage. And treat the rest of the "job", including repairs, basic upkeep, and returning deposits, like an unexpected project that nobody warned them about.

It's not easy to give up something you know for something uncertain

I'm not going to come here and act as if you should always leave every secure thing you have behind and chase every random dream. Sometimes that's simply not the best road to take, and you should, for example, save a little money first, or wait it out, land a remote job and travel with a stable income; I mean, there are countless safer options than leaving everything behind with no backup.

When we have these big desires, such as travelling the world, we seldom think that there is limited time to make them come true. Of course, technically there isn't; you could potentially travel the world at 60, but how can we be sure what our situation will be like at that age?

Settling isn't the end of the world; you can travel if you have a partner and a family, but it's true that it makes matters more complicated. To me, the central things are desire and how burnt out you are from your current job.

This employee says he has already paid his student loan and has savings; the only thing holding him back would be guilt, but are we willing to sacrifice our whole lives to guilt? What would we get in exchange? More stress and a day-to-day life that feels pointless?

The decision doesn't have to be that drastic, really. You can take only a year off and come back. If you already started your career and have some experience, the year-long gap won't look as bad on your resume if you can justify it with a random 'experience-building' paragraph.

What would you do? Wait it out till the next holiday and keep your steady job? Or go on the adventure, relax, and rethink your life?

Should experience be the only deciding factor in promotions?

The workplace is supposed to be a meritocracy, and as a result, we might expect that more years on the job make an employee a better candidate to advance to the next stage of their chosen career. When somebody has put in the time and the effort with their employer, it can get to a point where this reward isn't just hoped for; it is expected. They believe they deserve a promotion.

However, life does not always work that way, and the logic behind who gets the fancier job title is often more convoluted than more experience = better candidate. Maybe putting a particular person in this position doesn't fit with the business plan, or there is somebody else who the higher-ups believe is simply a better choice. It can be a bitter pill to swallow for anybody who has worked hard with the hopes that they would get promoted, only to see the role go to a colleague. At the same time, it is their professional duty to deal with their feelings and find a productive way to work with this individual. If they don't do that, they are going to face problem after problem.

Who moves in with their boyfriend after two months?

Just because you love your partner doesn't mean that it's time to live with them. Moving in together is a big commitment, and if you do it too early, it will probably end pretty badly. A lot of young couples don't move in together until they're married, which definitely has its downsides. I don't think you really know your partner until you've lived with them full-time. Just because someone is a good boyfriend doesn't mean that they are a good roommate, and you want your future husband to be a good roommate and a good (former) boyfriend.

There is really nothing wrong with living with a roommate for the first couple of years of your relationship. It might be kind of difficult to feel like you're ever truly alone if your roommate is always at home when you're at home with your partner, but having a roommate who you're not dating feels a lot more secure than sharing a lease with somebody who you're dating. Your roommate is less likely to stop paying rent because you and her had a falling out. If you and your boyfriend are both on the same lease and you break up, he could walk out, block you, stop paying rent, and you'd still be responsible for paying the rent and utilities on y'all's shared place. If you have a nice landlord who takes pity on you, there's a chance you could break the lease, but that's a big IF.

The young woman in this story has had a roommate for the past year, but now that her roommate has a brand new boyfriend, things are going awry. The roommate wants her boyfriend to move into the apartment and wants her roommate out of the house as soon as possible. What would you do if you found yourself in a situation like this?

Toxic people have no place in our lives, even if they're family. 

A young woman shared her story of dealing with family members who don't deserve to be called family. They all come from her dad's side of the family, and they enforce a weird hierarchy on everybody. Some members of the family are at the "top," and others are at the "bottom." They've used that for years to treat each other badly, speak behind each other's backs, and meddle in issues that are none of their business. They've treated her father like a scapegoat his entire life and used his personal issues with his daughter against them. His daughter had had enough at one point and sent them a message that said everything she thought about them. Suffice it to say that the tone was as mean and disrespectful as theirs had been her entire life. They called her parents to complain instead of taking it out with her, so she grabbed the phone and started arguing with her aunt and then her cousin. Their arguments were ridiculous and made no sense, so she ended the conversation afterwards. She told her dad that if he wanted to have a relationship with them, it was his right, but she didn't want to see them anymore. 

Not because someone is family does it mean that we have to let them treat us poorly or let them walk all over us. Respect goes both ways; it's something that is earned and kept through being a decent and fair human being. Hierarchies don't exist inside a family, and if they think that they should be revered for being older, we're sorry, but they were born in the wrong century. Things work differently now. They don't get to make their relatives feel like trash and expect them to bow their heads and abide by anything they say. They need a good lesson in humility and what family actually means. This girl is brave, and probably she'll be the reason why her father finally frees himself from his sibling's toxic attitude. Everybody deserves to feel at home with their family, not like they're in a never-ending war. 

When you can't relax even in your own home

Parents introducing us to their new partners is almost always uncomfortable. Everyone tries to act nicely, but it's very hard to get along on the first day. And for everyone dating someone with a son or daughter, this post is also relevant to avoid some things that are far from ideal.

I think that when we're nervous about somebody accepting us, we tend to be far too nice, even to the point that it's ridiculous, and that kind of hospitality, when it's inside your own house, the one you're used to being in since you were little- can make anyone uncomfortable. It is absolutely tiring to have someone asking you if you need anything or telling you instructions about how to behave in the house.

Plus, if you are the partner of someone who has kids, don't act like a stepmother or stepdad right away because it's not your place to assume that role; when it happens, it's more like something that's given to you with time and trust. Either way, you're never going to have that role with a 30-year-old, like in this story, so you can use some common sense and you'll be fine.

In my opinion, this girlfriend was very nervous and started acting ridiculously, or she literally didn't know whether the daughter knew the house, and she started acting like it was hers because she stayed there very often, and that's definitely more on the father's side of responsibility.

Is it ever ethical to take the job of the manager who got you your role in the first place?

Good managers can be a rare breed, so it is important to count your blessings when you experience one. While it may be unwise to think of them as your friend, they make an employee's working life significantly easier if they are doing their job properly. They are the type who you don't always fully appreciate at the time, but if somebody bad replaces them, you can bet that you will feel the difference. 

Just because a boss is competent in their role doesn't mean that they will stick around forever, whether that is because they have decided to transition or the company has decided that they are no longer needed. As an employee, it is important to be ready for this change, which can be destabilizing. You never know what might come next at work, and it might even get to a point where you are expected to fill their role. While this can sometimes be an honor and a welcome next step, there are times when this may be more of a dilemma than you want it to be.

Quiet quitting is the new 'I give up' after not getting what you wanted?

Quiet quitting seems to be just doing your job instead of putting your everything into every task and doing free extra hours every day. It seems to just be the "I give up" for the core employees that do everything around the office but get tired of getting disrespected and disregarded by managers. Is for the employees who deserved a promotion but instead only got to see everyone else get it, even when they didn't deserve it. It is the outcome of the unfairness of the office dynamic in which bosses favor people they like instead of the people who deserve it.

A viral story about a 28-year-old woman being forced to leave a home she inherited has highlighted the problems with age-restricted living communities in a modern housing market where seniors and retirees aren't downsizing, as they normally would, and young people struggle to make the step into real estate ownership

55+ senior communities and similar age-restricted living communities present a unique problem to young would-be homeowners. As does the social dynamic surrounding them. All of this is pushed to a head by the modern state of the housing market. 

How convenient to skip the gardening and show up just in time to claim the harvest…

Gardening is not only a hobby, but a talent. Not everyone is into it, and that's totally fine! Some people prefer building and creating beautiful gardens because greens and plants are energizing to them, while others might choose to exercise or whatever other activity they prefer. However, unlike other hobbies, gardening requires a lot of time and patience because the results are not seen until much later, so the people who are involved in gardening know this and learn to wait. 

The Reddit user u/Creative-Acadia4201shared that she and her coworker Jenny had been taking care of the office garden all by themselves. There were petitions in the past from other employees who wanted to remove it and do something else with the spot, but they were strong and promised to take care of it, so every week they had a gardening session. Slowly but surely, the garden started to bloom, and they even had some fruit and vegetables planted.

Three years later, Jenny was not able to go to the office for a while, and the OP had to take care of her mother, so she asked for someone to water the garden until one of them came back. Someone volunteered but told them that he would be taking the squash and the watermelon home, since they were ready to be harvested. Of course, both women were very upset: since they were the ones who did the gardening for all those years, they would be the ones taking all of that home. Logic, right?

This man was angry and decided to tell everyone at the office that these two ladies had prevented him from going to the garden, and made them look like selfish people. But I think the OP was correct: if you take care of something that demands a lot of attention and patience, as a garden does, it's not only appropriate but fair for the ones involved to be the ones harvesting and taking those products home.